Lost Connections
by felicitytorres
Summary: What if Spencer tried to have a relationship with his father. Maybe he has an extended family besides his mom.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I was never really satisfied after the Memoriam episode. I felt the writers could have done so much more with that story. So here I go. I'm going to try and dig a little deeper into Spencer's relationship with his father. Wish me luck. If I crash and burn tell me. **

"hmmmph" ... He crashed himself on the bed with a resounding thud. What a day it had been. Finding out his mother was indirectly involved with a murder. Finding out your dad helped cover up the involvement. And on top of all that finding out your dad was too much of a coward to stay with him and his mom.

He heard the apology. At the time he was so guilty for his wrong accusations that he actually tried to accept it. But the more he thought about it the angrier he became. How could a man, his own father leave him with an emotionally sick mother? And not only that, but to be living a few miles away from him his whole childhood and never check in on him. Never a birthday wish, a christmas card, a graduation gift, not one damn word and he was only a few miles away! And now he says sorry. Now. And only now because of the case. If he weren't looking into the Jenkins case he never would have come into contact with him. He would have never apologized! He knows its wrong to hate, but by God he really feels like he hates his dad. Dad... That word is too good for him. Father. Ha. He long lost that title.

Lets just say he really hates William Reid right now. The only bright spot in this day was seeing JJ and Henry. He just can't believe JJ would make him, him of all people, a God-father. Him who knows nothing about kids.

"Me, Spencer Reid and God-father".

As absurb as the whole idea sounds, its exactly what he needed today. Somehow JJ just knows how to always cheer him up. He makes a promise to himself not to let JJ down. He'll live up to that title even if he doesn't know how to be a father figure.

He chuckles to himself, "I'll just do the exact opposite of what my, no William did, and I will be doing just fine," he says with a smirk.

"God I need a long bath." He shuffles to the bathroom to draw the water. Just as he turns to go, his phone rings. " Ugh...who could that be?" He picks up.

"Reid"

"Hello Spencer, its your dad."

**to be cont...**


	2. Chapter 2

chapt. 2

"Dad, (damn it! he was going to call him William for spite) what...why are you calling? Its late and its been a really long day. I just want to get some rest."

"Spencer, I'm sorry for calling so late, I just really didn't like the way we left things."

"What, today, or 17 years ago?", Spencer said bitterly.

William gave a long sigh. "Well, both actually."

"There are so many things that I didn't get to tell you, so much that I need to say. I just couldn't find the right time or the right words to say them."

Spencer sighed. He was really starting to feel irritated.

"Look, I know you are probably dealing with a lot of guilt right now, which is certainly understandable, you have a lot to be guilty about, but I'm not in the mood to make amends. Please, if you really want to talk, then do it tomorrow, I'm really not up for this now."

"Spencer I know today has been very troubling for you. And I want you to know I'm not mad anymore about the mistake you made. You're bitter and you just wanted to find something, anything to get back at me for what I did to you and your mother. Just know, I forgive you."

Spencer could no longer hold in all the venom, "Wow, that's rich...**You **forgive **me**! You self-centered son-of-a bitch! This investigation was not about you. It was about trying to get to the truth. Trying to put the pieces together from something that has been plaguing me for years. You just so happened to be one of the pieces in the puzzle." "I can't do this right now. This day has drained all the strength out of me. Just please, I can't talk to you now."

"Alright Spencer, then tomorrow... I know you are upset, and angry, and you have every right to be. I failed you as a father. I was scared and honestly just not capable of giving so much of myself to another human being." "It was not just you Spencer, it was your mom, and every relationship after. It was never you. You were never the problem. It was me, and only me. And I'm just so sorry that I was never able to be the father I should have been to both of my children. he sighed... I've wasted enough of your time. I'll call you tomorrow. Goodnight Spencer." he hung up.

Spencer was sitting on the bed, mouth open, brow furrowed, stunned and utterly confused.

"Did he say **both**"


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I cannot apologize enough for keeping you guys waiting for this update. My brain just couldn't focus on where to take this. But I think I'm back on track with the holiday thing. Promise this story will be finished by Christmas. Thanks for waiting patiently. Reviews are more than welcome. :)**

ch 3.

Spencer was sitting at his desk, hardly able to function after last nights phone call from his dad. He kept running it over and over in this mind, "both of my children" . Could it really be possible? Could he really have a sister or brother out there? He always wondered what it would be like to have a sibling. Someone to share experiences with. Someone to confide in, and be there for you no matter what.

He witnessed this type of comradery with Morgan and his sisters, how they had his back. How they were so protective of him. He wondered what it would be like to feel that way towards someone else. Well, of course he felt a family like connection with the team. But this would be totally different. Could this actually be true? He kept staring at the clock wishing it was time to go home. He had to talk to his father to get to the bottom of this.

Five o'clock finally rolled around. He knew it was a trick of the mind, thinking that somehow it came slower today, but it sure seemed like it. He made it home, changed clothes, ate a bowl of cereal and waited. Waited for that phone call. He said he would call. But the more he thought about it, how reliable is he? If he wanted to talk to him, he better do the calling because with his dad's track record on promises, he would probably wait a lifetime for that call.

He picked up his cell phone and searched for the number. "There it is. Alright here goes," It's ringing, ringing, ringing, going to voice mail. Spencer hung up. "Damn it." He sighed heavily. He returned to the TV when his phone rang.

"Reid" he answered.

"Hello Spencer, I see that you called. I was going to call you later tonight after I felt you were settled in from work."

"Well I wasn't banking on receiving that call, so I decided to call you instead. Look I'm not going to hold you long, I just wanted you to explain something you said last night that totally baffled me. You were saying how you were never able to be the father you should have been to both your children. I don't understand, do you have another child?"

William sighed. "Yes, Spencer I do. I have a daughter. It was a long time ago, I never remarried but I did become involved with a lawyer at the firm. Things got messy between us. She quit the firm but not without leaving me with the bombshell that she was pregnant. Suffice it to say she didn't want to have anything to do with me because the way we left things, and told me she would take care of everything. She didn't want a dime from me. So I let her go. But it started to bother me that I was continuing this cycle of neglecting my offspring so after a few years I approached her about trying to become a part of Melissa's life, that's her name by the way. She cooled off over the years and started to slowly incorporate me into Melissa's life. I see Melissa on holidays, I send her a birthday gift every year. But Spencer we are not close. When Jill married, her husband became the real father to Melissa. I'm just like a distant uncle, a father in name only. But it's my own fault. I have no one to blame but myself. If I really wanted to be more involved, I should have fought for it."

Spencer sat there stunned and overwhelmed by all of this. It took him a moment to form a thought.

"Does she know anything about me? How old is she?"

"She's fifteen, going on thirty. Very bright and opinionated. She reminds me a little of you. She does know I have a son, but I told her we were estranged."

"Well, that's one way to put it. Estranged would imply that we had some falling out and we parted company mutually. The truth is you left and never looked back."

"Spencer, do we really have to do this..."

"Ok, ok, you're right, sorry I'm a little bitter, which I'm sure you should understand. I just want to know can I meet her?"

"Ummmm...well...I'm sure that can be arranged. She usually spends Christmas Eve with me, then spends Christmas with her mom. Why don't you come to my house this Christmas Eve and I introduce her to you. I know Thanksgiving is around the corner, but I think this would give me a little time to break her into the idea of having an older brother. She already has a four year old little brother named Josh, but now she gets to be the little sis. What do you say Spencer? My place Christmas Eve, can we make it a date?"

Spencer was a little hesitant, but the thought of meeting his sister outwayed an awkward evening with daddy dearest. "Ok, it's a date?"


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Another chapter as promised. "I will finish this before Christmas", thats my mantra. Please review. I have another chapter coming right behind this one real soon. Maybe even today.**

ch. 4

He couldn't believe how fast Christmas was approaching. Tomorrow he would be leaving to Vegas to spend Christmas eve with his dad and sister. He was a bundle of nerves. The plan was to spend the day with his father and new found sister, then spend Christmas with his mother. He didn't know how he would explain all of this to his mom. She probably would feel betrayed by the whole idea that now Spencer had a new family of sorts, that he didn't need her, that somehow she was being replaced and left behind. He hoped she wouldn't feel that way. That's the last thing he was trying to do. He just wanted to get to know his sibling. He had so few family connections, he hoped she would understand, but knowing his mom he knew everything in her mind was some sort of conspiracy. He could only hope he caught her on a good day.

He talked to his dad the other day and was reassured that Melissa was pleased he wanted to meet her. Now if he could just finish packing and try to get some rest, maybe in the morning his nerves would settle a bit.

His phone started to ring. Who could be calling at this time of night? He looked down at his phone and saw it was William, his dad.

"Hello"

"Hello Spencer, I''m sorry to call so late but I had to be sure it was ok with you before I did it."

"Before you did what?"

"Melissa wants your phone number so she can talk to you before you come. The poor girl is so nervous about meeting you she feels like it may break the tension a little if she talked to you before-hand, so is it alright? Can I give her your number?"

Spencer thought for a moment. If he said no, that would definately make him seem like a jerk, but if he said yes, what would they talk about? He's not exactly a social butterfly around women, especially teen-age girls. What would they have in common? Ok ok, stop. I'm over thinking this as usual. This will be a general get to know you talk. This is not some popularity contest. I'll just be me.

"Spencer, you there?"

Spence cleared his thoat. "Um... yeah I'm here. Sure give her my number."

"That's great. She'll be thrilled. How is everything going with you?"

"I'm fine."

"Well, I'm looking forward to seeing both my kids under one roof. I'm having a caterer make dinner for us and we can all sit down and talk. Like family. The older you get Spencer you start to realize what's really important in life. Well, anyway, I don't want to hold you. Goodnight Spencer."

"Goodnight dad."

If he was nervous before, that was nothing in comparison to what he was feeling now. What if she called tonight. What should they talk about? The main thing he should do is try not to sound bitter. That wouldn't do anybody any good. But no sooner than he finished his thoughts the phone rang.

Unknown number.

**A/N: I know it's short, but I'm breaking things down in sections. :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Two in one day. I'm on a roll. "I will finish this before Christmas."**

Ch. 5

"Hello"

"Hello, is this Spencer?"

"Yes, this is Spencer."

"Um, hi this is Melissa, your half-sister."

"Yeah, hi... William told me you wanted to call."

"Right, right... awkward much right.?"

"Ha... You could say that."

"Well, I just kinda wanted to break the ice before meeting you. I think things are going to be weird enough as it is... so, you and William are not close huh?"

"No, we're not. That would definately be an accurate statement."

"Well, don't feel bad. William wouldn't win any father of the year contests. Truth be told I think he feels so guilty about not being around for me he tries to buy my affection. Needless to say I take full advantage of that, of course." she said humorously.

Spencer smirked, "You do, do you?"

"Well, maybe a little." she laughed, "He's alright. He just tries too hard because he wasn't around. I just think of him like an older friend. I have a dad."

She said that last statement so matter of factly that it caught Spencer off guard a little. He had to question her about it.

"You say you have a dad. So you and your step-dad must be very close."

"We are close. He is my dad. He married my mom when I was a little kid. He has been there for me in all the ways that count. I couldn't ask for a better dad. He wanted to adopt me way back when, but William kind of made a fuss about it, so he dropped the idea. But it doesn't matter. He is my real dad."

Spencer sighed, "You know through the years I learned to realize that family doesn't mean blood-related. I work with a group of people that I have come to think of as my family."

"That's great Spencer. William told me about the shitty way he left you and your mom. That's why I wanted to call you. I hoped we could talk more openly alone than when he's around. I'm sure he wants us to play nice nice happy family for the occasion but that's not really how it is, is it?

"No it isn't. I didn't want to come off angry or bitter in front of you. But truthfully I'm dealing with a lot of mixed emotions. I'm still angry about how dad just chose to forget about me, I'm angry I didn't know about you sooner. I'm just an angry person simply, but I'm really trying to reel it all in and get over it."

"Look, I didn't expect you to feel all warm and fuzzy about things, hell I know I wouldn't if I were in your place. I'm really amazed that you would even agree to all of this."

"Well I know that you're an innocent bystander in this, there's no use for me to take things out on you, or make things difficult. I'm just trying to put the past behind me and move forward."

"Good luck with that" she said sarcastically.

"But seriously, I hope you can put things in the past. I've had to overlook a lot of things regarding dad, and just accept things for what they are. Some people just aren't made to be parents. That doesn't make him a bad person, it's just he's not cut out to be a father-figure. I've accepted it and just appreciate him for what he is to me, a friend. He really can be a nice person if you get to know him a little."

"Well I guess that's what I've got to do. Stop having some sort of idealized fantasy of what I think my relationship should be with him, and just, as you say, accept it for what it is."

"Trust me. The sooner you give up the grand notion of what you think it should be, the happier you'll be. My mom told me the same thing I'm telling you years ago and it really helped me a lot."

"Thanks Melissa. You really have helped me with something. I'm already reaping the benefits of having a sister."

"Awww, thanks big-bro. I can't wait to meet you in person. I know it's late so, goodnight. See you tomorrow."

"Goodnight." he hung up the phone.

Maybe this won't be a disaster after all.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Finally done. Thank you guys for being patient with me. I can't write until I'm inspired you know, but I did finish before Christmas. Sorry I kinda rushed the getting to Vegas part but I wanted to get to the main part as soon as possible. Don't forget to review. :)**

The day had finally come. It was Dec. 24, He would be flying out this morning and be in Las Vegas by noon. He was packed and ready at least physically ready. To be honest he was just a little anxious about the coming evening. Talking to his dad on the phone was one thing, but to spend a whole evening with him was another. At least on the phone he had the option of hanging up when things got uncomfortable or awkward. He just wished he could get this over with, at least the socializing with dad part, however he was looking forward to meeting his sister._

The flight was uneventful, which was a good thing and he had settled in at the hotel. He called his dad to let him know he made it and to get the directions to his house and what time to be there. He showered got dressed and called a cab. This was it. He kept saying to himself, maybe it wont be so bad. Hopefully he'd be right.

The cab had arrived and let him out at his destination. Spencer looked around at the house. It was not exactly how he would have pictured it. In his mind he thought his dad would be in some modern looking house, really sleek and made for a bachelor's lifestyle, but what he saw was totally different. It was a modest little house, with a white picket fence, just what you may expect a real family man to have. Everything about his father was misleading, right down to the house he chose to live in.

He rung the door bell. William opened the door arms stretched out and welcoming.

"Hello, Spencer. I'm so glad you made it. Was the flight OK?

"Yes, everything was fine."

"Well, come in have a seat. Melissa should be here shortly."

They moved to the den. It was cozy, with big overstuffed cusions on the couch and throw pillows everywhere.

"Would you like something to drink? I have cider and eggnog, or maybe just a Coke?

"No, no, I'm fine thank you.

"Spencer I'm so glad that you decided to move past the past and agree to this. I really want things to be different between us. I know I've been a horrible parent. I can admit that. There was a time when I had so many excuses, that I couldn't say that. But I'm finally owning my mistakes. I was ready to be a father, and I wasn't ready to be a husband. A lot of times we feel like just because we are old enough that we are ready to do things in life. But Spencer even in my thirties I was just not mature enough to be the sort of man who had the responsibility of a family. Am I making any sense to you?"

"Actually you are. And thank you for owning up to the fact that you sucked as a dad. All the excuses were just making me more angry about the situation. It's funny that just by you telling the cold hard truth that you were a horrible father, somehow I feel more forgiving about the situation. Sometimes people just aren't ready to do certain things, and marriage and fatherhood were just two things you weren't ready for." Spencer smiled sheepishly.

"Thank you Spencer. I guess the truth is the best policy after all. I may not be able to be the father that you wished I could be, be hopefully Spencer I can be a friend you can lean on. At least for starters anyway." William said with hopefulness.

Spencer grinned,"Yeah, I think I would like that."

The door bell rang. "Oh, that's Melissa." William said as he got up to open the door.

"Hello, Melissa." He said while giving her a hug.

"Hello, Dad. How have you been?"

"Good, but better now that you are here. Guess who's in the den as we speak?"

"Spencer, he's here?" she said in a hushed tone.

"Yes he's here."

"Wow, I'm a little nervous."

"Don't be. Things are going well between us, and I know he's anxious to meet you, so shall we." he motioned towards the den. Spencer was still sitting, a bit nervous to even turn around but before you knew it they had made there way to the den.

"Spencer, this is Melissa. Melissa this is Spencer." Spencer stood up to meet her. He stretched out his hand to shake hers. She was tall, not very tall, but tall for most girls. She had sandy brown hair and brown eyes. She looked a little like Spencer in some ways but she must have took after her mom mainly. She did have a warm and pleasant smile.

"Wow, we finally meet. I guess I have a bit of an advantage dad showed me some pictures of you awhile back. He told me all about your honors in school and with the FBI. You're quite impressive."

"Thanks. That stuff is nice but all those things did have their downfalls. I spent so much time emersing myself in studies that it didn't give me a chance for a social life. Dad told me you're very active in school. You're in theater arts, you're one of the editor's on your schools newspaper. You're on the volleyball team. And you were a junior pom pom girl in junior high."

Melissa laughed. "Well, I guess we can just trade resumes and call it a day, huh dad."

They all laughed.

"Melissa, why don't you and Spencer sit down. And I go get everything set up for dinner."

Melissa sat down next to Spencer. "So dad says everything was going well between you two. No major blow outs yet, huh."

Spencer chuckled, "No, no blowouts, and I don't think there will be one, at least not today. He opened up a little to me and I think I understand things better than I ever had."

"Good Spencer, I'm glad. I know you know what dad has told you about me through your phone calls, but I hope that you can get to know me for me, and not just know the things I do, if that makes any sense."

"That makes perfect sense. I hope the same thing too."

"Good." she looked down awkwardly. "I know we don't know each other but it is Christmas so I got you something."

"Oh, wow, Melissa I wish you hadn't done that. I don't have anything for you." Spencer looked disappointed.

"Oh, don't worry about it, me gaining a brother is gift enough. But here, Merry Christmas!" she said as she handed the gift to Spencer.

Spencer looked at her with amazement. "Thank you, I don't know what to say."

Spencer held the gift in his hand looking at it in wonder.

"Well, aren't you going to open it?"

"Oh yeah." Spencer chuckled, as he opened the gift. He looked at the pretty book that Melissa gave him. It was a hand made scrapbook titled "All about Me"

"It's a scrapbook." Melissa said. "I hope the title doesn't sound too conceited, but it really is all about me. My mom helped me make it. It has some pics of me when I was little, some others of me at different events. I even have a page about my likes and dislikes. And in the back is all my contact info, my e-mail address, and how to find me on facebook, and twitter."

"Wow, this is really amazing! Thank you, thank you so much." he said while reaching out to give her a hug.

William stepped back into the room. "Well, I see you two are getting along well."

Spencer said, "Yeah, we really are." as he smiled from ear to ear.

"Well, I hope you guys are hungry cause dinner is served."

They all moved to go to the dinner table.

Spencer thought to himself, "This may be my best Christmas ever."

'


End file.
